For Real Love Choose To Be First In Your Life

All of us desire a life of happiness, peace and Love. We strive for it, seek it, and make it our ultimate dream. For sensitive people, we often try so hard to earn this Love from others. Codependency is birthed from this need. Yet for real love, choose to be first in your life.

The idea of being first gets confused so often in our culture. Back in my boxing days, Coach Rivas would shout “Be First!” Typically during sparring sessions this happened. Until I was able to put the principle into play in my own life this mantra didn’t make sense.

The idea of being first is often used in our modern business culture

Which is driven by winning. Pushing yourself above others so that you get the top spot, win the big prize for your work, and are heralded as a champion. But these are the side benefits from the real work of being first.

If you make the fruit the goal instead of growing the whole tree, you miss out on what benefits are most important in the process.

Winning alone is not as powerful as operating from a place of wholeness where there’s a victorious attitude in all you do. Yes, that’s philosophy and psychology there. It’s also spiritual and emotional. There’s a mental health aspect too.

Here’s something for you to grasp ahold of as we move forward into the realms of what it means to Be First in order for you to have real Love in your life. And truly gain all the benefits of this method.

To be first is about newness

It’s creation. It’s bringing life into something where it didn’t exist before. And in order to do that, you must be committed to the process. You also must be solid in yourself, your identity, and fearless in your pursuit of what you want. 

Doubt is something everyone faces. Some people struggle with it intensely and it holds them back from the life they want. They second-guess themselves constantly and take forever to make decisions. Napoleon Hill teaches in Think and Grow Rich that the most successful people in the world make decisions quickly and change slowly. There’s something important here to grasp.

It’s from a place of confidence in self and certainty in your ability that allows you to make decisions swiftly, without overthinking. Overthinking looks and dissects at all the potential problems so that the obstacles become more of the focus than the goal. Where focus goes, energy flows. Or as I teach in Be Solid, what you focus on grows.

By overthinking, your mental energy can get directed at potential problems more than opportunities. Which decreases the flow of energy on possibilities and opportunities.

In boxing, if you stand in front of your opponent and try to figure out which punch to throw without actually committing to something, you’re going to get hit. Unless you’re planning on countering with something, you’re going to get hit more. This isn’t how winning happens.

To win in life you have to Be First

Which means you have to initiate. Put yourself out there. Create the opening you want. 

In business, this means going first to set up the meeting. Asking for the opportunity to serve instead of waiting for your prospect to ask for your business. 

In relationships, it’s offering to show up and do something for someone else first. It’s asking questions to get to know someone more or understand them on a deeper level.

It’s choosing to draw boundaries for yourself first and uphold them. Instead of going the codependent road of trying to make others happy so you feel some sense of peace.

This is a new concept for many people. But it’s from a place of solidarity in who you are that you’re able to initiate these kinds of opportunities for growth. 

It can be painful at first because of the newness of being the first person to start. But all things that are new go through experiences of pain to come into being.

Being First is about birthing something original

A new life brought into the world is a process of pain, both for the mother and the child. The child goes from a cocoon of protection and provision into a realm they’ve never experienced before. It is frightening. The mother and child have an instinctive connection, but there’s still a newness that requires trust to be built between the two.

Mother Earth creates life every day and that new life involves pain. Yet from this pain, great things are given opportunity to grow and receive new life.

The growth process is where the winning takes place. It’s not a one-time thing. It’s an ongoing cycle of taking risks, facing obstacles, and pushing through challenges so that something great can be made true.

The purpose of the Be First method is to take the foundations laid out in Be Solid: How To Go Through Hell & Come Out Whole. Use these foundations for building a new way of being that moves you forward into the next phase of your new self. The old you is no more.

There’s a new sheriff in town

As you stand in your power and solidarity, your life changes.  You are ready to take on the world without fear, doubt, or beliefs in your inabilities.  

Instead you are full of confidence, faith, and self-Love that knows it’s only a matter of time for all good things to come into being. This is how Love flows in you and through you.

And from this place, being first is about going first. In strength, courage, and power.

As you take risks and stand in your solidarity, you are able to facilitate Love in more powerful ways. Because it comes from within, instead of trying to seek it outside of you.

This is the path of true success.

Love. As your center and way of being.

From this place you initiate the change and transformation that leads you into all that you want and desire.

Take this principle and transform your life

If you want to grow Love inside your heart and mind garden, overcome past hurts, and truly be first in creating the life of your dreams, set up a free coaching session with me here.