When stress never seems to end, work deadlines feel like an assassin stalking you every day. How will you keep up? Add to this the feelings of anxiety and overwhelm that there are never enough minutes to do all you need to do. Or take care of everyone expecting you to serve them.
You keep your head to the grindstone because you’ve made commitments to reaching certain deadlines. There are people waiting for you to deliver. But you don’t have the energy, confidence, and strength to push through another twelve hour slog. But it doesn’t stop at work, does it?
What about once you get home?
That’s right! Little Timmy took his crayons to the living room wall again. A series of stickman superheroes fighting crime is a live comic book for all to see.
Or maybe your roommate decided to let your cast-iron skillet “soak” off the burnt bacon (yikes!). Or your partner keeps leaving pieces of dental floss all over the house.
What do you do? You blow your top! You melt down like Little Tommy does when you seize his crayons.
All that tension and stress built up your anxiety and once you get to a breaking point, there’s hell to pay.
The truth is, those situations are inappropriate–but your reaction is even worse. And it creates more and bigger problems than anything else. Which increases the overwhelm and anxiety.
Making things go from bad to OH MY GOD THIS IS GOING TO KILL ME!!!!!
Don’t choose to let this be your daily experience
I was asked to speak to a group of artists about how to take care of ourselves so that we can take care of other people. The question came from a subject I’ve covered on my Healthy Dose Of Vitamin D Grant video series.
The same inner issues that surround a full-time musician in dealing with overwhelm, anxiety, and stress are what business leaders, executives, and entrepreneurs wrestle with every day. I bet you wrestle with similar types of the same issue too.
What does it look like to take care of ourselves so that we have more enough energy, care, time and love for others that we want to work with?
Is taking care of yourself a priority, or are you constantly putting other people ahead of you on the priority list and always seeming to come up short?
It’s a matter of keeping your “inner well” full
There’s a metaphor that will help you understand why taking care of yourself is so important in you being able to help other people AND have peace in the process.
Remember back in the day before indoor plumbing? A while ago, people got their daily water from a well. It was either on their property or somewhere in their community. Folks would to the well and lower buckets into it to draw out water. With this water, they could live. They could have water to drink, to wash, to clean, to take care of themselves.
But what happened if the well ran dry? Anxiety and stress overload!!! They would not be able to take care of themselves or their families. There would be a huge burden on individuals and groups. Ultimately the whole community would suffer.
Niklas Goke has a very powerful statement about how love really is and how it really works, that fits perfectly into this metaphor for how we take care of ourselves to keep anxiety, stress, and overwhelm from taking over. He says,
“We’re so intent on seeking it outside ourselves, on finding the noun — the feeling — in another person, that we forget it’s the verb we control. The action. The choice. Most of all, we forget that love starts with loving ourselves.“
Which is why looking at your heart as a well is so important. If you spend all day having other people ask you to do things for them, they’re drawing water from your heart well. Relationships with anyone (family, work, spouse/partner, friends, etc) involve being in a place of giving. When you spend your time giving-Giving-GIVING….it drains your well.
You have to love yourself to keep your heart full of love and care so that you can give to others. Failing to love yourself is starving yourself from being able to be at peace.
Why loving yourself is so key to keeping anxiety away
You cannot pour from an empty cup. You certainly can’t be a resource for yourself or other people if you allow your inner well to run dry.
Which is why it’s so important to take care of yourself and treat your inner well with the care it deserves.
You do this by filling yourself with encouragement and light on a daily basis. What does that look like? Affirm to yourself that you are good, whole, solid, worthy, and amazing! Giving yourself love is telling yourself loving things. If you can say loving and encouraging things to others, why not do the same for yourself?
Also, surround yourself with good people. Be mindful of the people you spend time with. Positive and affirming people will help you keep your heart well full.
And make sure that you are maintaining a healthy balance of work and play.
This is the consistent thread that my coaching clients come to me for help with. It’s about finding the peace, strength, and empowerment to go beyond reaching their goals, but thriving in the process.
If your work life is suffering, your home life is suffering too. Maybe it’s causing tension and anxiety with your interpersonal relationships. Maybe you’re having a hard time relaxing or being present with your family and friends. You find yourself overthinking and constantly stressful.
And you don’t know what to do about it.
Success in business and in life is much more than reaching financial goals, though those are certainly wonderful to meet. Success comes in having confidence, peace, and solidarity in the process. Being able to handle more and taking care of yourself at the same time. It’s about enjoying life while you live it, instead of grinding away with the hope that one day things will work out.
Would you rather have peace in the process or stress in the grind?
Imagine peace in the process. Not an easy fix or magic pill. But actual peace during your work, where each day is a joy to experience. Your work is what you get excited about. The people you serve, work with, and provide for are a blessing to interact with. You love the opportunity to do what you do. Growth and success feel wonderful and you want to do more of it.
As you opt for peace in the process, with a measure of confidence and empowerment on a daily basis, the way forward just takes a small commitment you make to yourself. Just 5-10 minutes everyday. The way to get there is detailed in this powerful ebook, a part of the Growth Farming Method For Success and Transformation.
The results are inner peace, confidence, better relationships in your personal and professional world and strength in yourself. The inner critic is silent. Instead, your well will overflow with joy and peace for yourself and those you serve. Life, the way it was intended to be lived with peace and success for everyone.
Take the next step towards peace and away from stress by refilling your well today.
Don’t operate from a half-full perspective anymore. The inner well of your heart and mind deserve love and encouragement.
Give that to yourself with a short conversation with me. No sales pitch. Just affirmation, clarity, and love.
I look forward to talking with you!